Today I am not gonna tell a dream. Today I am talking about something that happened to me few hours ago. I wish that it was a dream, but it is not.
I was walking down on Smith Street, Collingwood, Australia, Earth, Universe. An Aboriginal man stopped me asking me something. I already knew that it was about money, but I decided not to judge, and listen to him. He needed money to pay for his bed tonight. 15 dollars. I gave him $1.70. He looked at me with a disappointed face and asked “Can you give me more?”. I said masking my discomfort “I’m sorry I can’t, but I guess that it’s a good start towards your 15 dollars goal”. He looked and me and angrily mumbled something. I decided to keep listening to him. I asked him if he wasn’t happy with the money I gave him and he told me that he wanted the whole 15 dollars from me. So I decided to sit down on the bench with him and to honestly try to help him. I always thought that the money doesn’t help them. I wanted to do more. So I was thinking a way where maybe I could pay him something to work with me or another way in which he could sustain him self. As soon as I sat down with him he move farther on the bench and then stood up. He looked and me and said firmly: “If you don’t go away I will kick your head!”. I was rather shocked. I tried honestly to connect with him and he was abusing me verbally for doing that. I couldn’t work out why he was doing that. I said to him “I am trying to help you”. He repeated again, this time yelling “Go away or I will kick your head!”. I couldn’t believe it. Despite the threat I wasn’t afraid. And neither was I angry. I felt sad that he reached that point in his life. I imagined his journey and how he got there. While I was walking away he yelled “Go away, you and your God will not help me!”. Maybe he thought I was going to convert him? And maybe he had so many hard experiences of white Australians trying to convert him. I don’t know. I was calm but at the same time I could hear my voice shaking a bit. I passed by a group of Aboriginal men and women and one of the women yelled at me “You don’t speak like that to my brother, you c..t!”. Wow, they perceived me as the enemy, the white enemy that tried to “corrupt” a member of the group with my “Christian” persuasion.
I felt so sad. I fell powerless. I couldn’t connect. I decided not to ignore him and the result was the opposite of what I was expecting.
I feel sad about it but at the same time I think that everything that happens to us is a stimulus to improve and evolve. I have been thinking lately to connect with aboriginal communities for my project. Being it about inner and outer nature, it is unavoidable to relate to the aboriginal culture and traditions. This episode in reality gave me more motivation of connecting with them even more. I don’t believe that all the aboriginal are like the guy that I met today. I believe that I came across to him as a sign that I need to go deeper. He metaphorically “kicked my head” and shook me from ignoring their culture. It’s time to connect!!